I don’t like babies!
Wow, it actually feels quite liberating to write that down! I don’t like babies, I don’t like babies, I don’t like babies! Now some have you have probably got looks on your faces similar to the look you would have if I’d just admitted I eat baby kittens (I don’t by the way!) I mean, why on earth would somebody who has 2 very young children say such an awful thing right?
Don’t get me wrong here, I love MissB and MasterB completely and I wouldn’t change my situation at all. Everyday I am thankful that I have two beautiful, healthy children. We wanted two children close together in age and we consider ourselves extremely lucky that we got exactly what we wished for
By now some of you are probably thinking “definite PND” right now but you are wrong, I’m not depressed at all, tired yes and incredibly bored yes but not depressed. I’m completely of sane mind, I’m just saying I don’t enjoy the baby stage at all.
I’m sure most people love the helpless little cute baby stage and really won’t understand me here but I didn’t have babies to HAVE babies, I had them to have children! A bit like when buying a house, a mortgage is something that comes with it even though you don’t really enjoy it. Luckily with babies the baby stage only lasts a year and not 25 though
Babies to me are too needy, they cry a lot, they never sleep, they don’t give you much back and let’s face it they are pretty boring! It’s probably why I don’t go to baby groups or hang around with other mums with babies, I’m just not interested in what their little darlings have done, I don’t want to cuddle their babies. I have enough looking after my own thank you very much!
Of course I always do the fawning over new baby thing etc because that’s what’s expected right? I can’t really say no thanks when someone shoves their newborn baby in my arms, I can’t really tell them that their darling child is actually a bit freaky looking can I? And before anyone says anything MasterB has sticky out ears, his heads a funny shape and his hair grows into a Mohican (but he is mine so I can say that at least )
I feel guilty for wishing away the first year of MasterB’s life but I can’t help feeling that way. With MissB the first year had a certain novelty value to it but now I know just how much fun it becomes when they are a little older, I just want to press the fast forward button and be there now!
I have loved the last six months with MissB, now this age I really, really love. I could spend all day playing with MissB, she is so much fun and learning so much. Her communication skills are amazing and it is so nice to be able to have a conversation with her. I can’t wait until MasterB is a little older and can give something back in the same way.
Do I feel guilty that I’d much rather spend my time with MissB at the moment than with MasterB? Of course I do! I know MasterB will never remember this period in his life though and I felt the same about MissB too at this age. It doesn’t alter the fact that we have a wonderful bond and that she has turned into a beautiful, intelligent little girl though I’m sure once MasterB gets a little older the same will happen with him and the fun part of being a family of four will really start
So there we have it I don’t like babies! I’m not depressed, not a freak, not unkind, not a bad mother, not cold, not heartless…I just don’t LIKE babies!
PS Photos in this post were taken by my lovely sister Sonia Thorpe Photography